When Black Folks Need To Stalk My Profile and Then Call Themselves Insulting Me For Being Married To a White Woman, All It Does Is Make Me Laugh and Prove MY Point Perfectly


This is a picture of my family. It’s one of my favorite pictures. Now I don’t expect everyone else to love this or them as much as I do. That’s okay. They don’t have to. It’s not for them. However, when that concept is lost on people, that’s when the ignorance shows, just about every time.

The ignorance I’m talking about is from members of the online black community. Now it’s not exactly a huge shock that people on Facebook have a bunch more to say about me than they would ever say in person, but here’s the situation. A story is posted that is likely to generate buzz as far as race is concerned (in one way or another). The likely response is that a good majority of black folks jump online to talk about how racist every white person in the world is, along with slavery and everything else unrelated and that they have no clue about. Most other blacks join in and agree.

But then, aw hell…when an intelligent person like me comes along, assesses the ENTIRE situation and posts a thorough comment accordingly, a comment which doesn’t epitomize “Black Power” or “Whitey Is Out To Get Me,” then low and behold, big surprise, some have an issue with that.

Interesting. Didn’t see THAT coming.

For just about my entire life, the black community has “dictated” how other blacks are supposed to behave and carry themselves.  Most of this involves speaking like we are less than intelligent, blaming everything on whites, dressing like we live on the street, not associating with whites and get this one…not wanting success for ourselves.

Yeah. Not wanting success. Because that’s clearly a “white” thing.

My mother raised four of us mostly by ourselves in Baltimore city. As we got older, she decided she no longer wanted us to live there.  Now this is an area a lot of people aim to get out of, but when my mother was actually successful in doing so, she was called everything in the book.

Guess which race gave her the most grief?

I do a lot of things today like my mother, so no part of me isn’t proud of the person I’ve become. But I’ve gotten a lot of grief from the black community because I don’t fit this “mold” they say I’m supposed to fit in.

That’s okay. I’m going to be 36 in a few months. I don’t exactly NEED permission on how to carry myself. I do what I damn well please.

The reason I added this picture of my family is because when I comment on posts with the honest TRUTH about my feelings (which of course, don’t match what the black community  says I’m supposed to say), then they come back with the classic, unoriginal “sellout,” “coon” and “Uncle Tom.” The funny thing is that these people who do this aren’t even intelligent enough to realize that a second before, they were crying about racism where it didn’t apply. Then they come back with racist comments.

Oh, that’s right; I almost forgot. Black people can’t be racist (Yes, many DO believe this)

Since the people who raise hell on Facebook probably say a whole lot LESS in real life, many try to dictate how I’m to behave as though I’m supposed to listen to them. When it doesn’t happen, they get huffy.  Of course, they can’t just let it go, so they have to keep coming back with nonsense. When I don’t buy the foolishness, they have nothing left. So they have to “check” my profile for “material.” And this is all they’re able to come up with.  Telling me that I married a white woman.

No shit, Sherlock. I know I married a woman who happens to be white.  I was THERE.

My honest belief, whether people agree or not is that many members of the black community may or may not agree with society’s “rules” on how we’re supposed to behave, but many also don’t have the guts or strength to do what THEY please rather than fit the stereotypes created by our community.  That is NOT me.  I have the strength to do WHAT I PLEASE and I’m not going to do what some community says I’m supposed to do.

Sadly, this intimidates a LOT of people. Rather than continuing to state their points, again, they have to resort to checking out my profile. Then I’ll get things like “your wife is ugly” or “your kids are ugly” which truthfully, is hilarious to me.  At THIS age, and “you’re ugly!” is what’s considered a “strong” response to a total stranger, someone you’ve never met?

You may as well say I have cooties and call me a “doo-doo head.”

My family is VERY beautiful and I am DAMN proud to call them my family. That is almost sixteen years strong.  I appreciate when people want to speak up for us, but trust me…I don’t need it. Some idiots online can’t hurt that sixteen years. They’re throwing pebbles up against a mountain. That nonsense bounces right off.

“But Robert…it must bother you if you talk about it…” No…it doesn’t. Just because someone talks about something doesn’t mean it bothers them. I just find it funny and I’m speaking on that. Really, it’s so weak that it’s a joke to me. These people are like some little kids who run up to me and kick me in the knees because they didn’t get their way, or in this case, because I didn’t just shut up and buy the nonsense they were spewing.

I talk often about this because I find it funny and sad at the same time. The black community feels like I owe them something. The same community who put my mother down for wanting better for her children…this is the same community I supposedly “owe” something to. Then I’m a “sellout,” why? Because I’m strong enough to not just blindly buy into it?

Don’t get me wrong (and this is the part much of our community doesn’t seem to understand). I get that racism is alive and well. Saying all this does NOT mean racist white people have gone away. FAR FROM IT.

But goodness knows, racism is alive and well from MANY angles and not just from what white people are doing. I have the strength to speak up about when it comes from us and many members of our community don’t like that. That sounds like a personal problem to me.

It’s a sad sight when people comment back about looking at “all my pictures” to try and put my family down. Not with anything factual, but with grade school insults. The jealousy is astounding. How can it not be? There is nothing worse for some people than to see a strong family that society largely says is NOT supposed to exist, but it does. See, I’m supposed to be ashamed of my wife because she’s white. I’m supposed to hide all my pictures, never hold her hand in public and pretend I’m “wrong” for marrying her. Some members of our community are so sure this will be the case that when I show them that it isn’t, they just don’t know how to handle it. So they lash out and stalk my profile.

Yeah…you really told me.

The grasping at air is just really sad and desperate.  I’ve heard some of this stuff so many times that I’m seriously waiting on them to say more. I’m really expecting more to come out and it doesn’t. I’m bracing myself for the “hammer” to be dropped and nope, it never is. Cooties and doo-doo head is all I get.

So for those of you who like to stalk my profile when your little feelings get hurt, thank you for taking precious time out of your, uh, “busy” Facebook schedule to check out the pictures I posted that I obviously WANT people to see.  Just know that when you think you’re coming back with something strong, remember that if you had any intelligence at all, you would stay on the topic of discussion and not show your hand by coming to my profile. My wife and kids have nothing to do with the topic. Resorting to them only shows that you don’t have the patience, focus, strength, or intelligence to speak about a topic without having to “look” for something to cover up hurt feelings.

Remember, that’s more of a reflection on YOU than it will ever be to me. I don’t need to check your profile for material. My words and thoughts are strong enough. Coming to my profile shows that yours aren’t and they never will be. Period.

Any of you have a problem with that? My family and I are going to sunny Florida in a few days and we’ll be posting pictures from down there. There’s more “material” for you.

You’re welcome.

This entry was posted in Black community, Interracial, Interracial Marriages, White Community and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to When Black Folks Need To Stalk My Profile and Then Call Themselves Insulting Me For Being Married To a White Woman, All It Does Is Make Me Laugh and Prove MY Point Perfectly

  1. Jay Tarr says:

    Love is not defined by color, race, or even gender these days. But hate is defined by all of the mentioned just because it is different. SO what if a black man or woman is married to a white woman or man, so what if a hispanic is married to a white woman, or vice versa. When you keep living in the past at the year 1619, you will never advance to the now or prosper in the future because you will still be ignorant and stupid and you have stopped being human, you have become a monster.


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