#WomensMarch: To Women Saying, “I Don’t Need To March!”…IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU

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Since the Women’s March(es) on Saturday, January 20th, a lot of you have come out to boast about how, despite any problems you’ve faced in your lives, you don’t “need” to participate in an organized march of any kind. Some said that you’ve never experienced discrimination or sexism of any kind (WOW!), while others have said that having dealt with those issues have not made you “weak” or “helpless,” and that you are “strong” because of not having the need to participate in any kind of march or to protest about it. Of course, there are also those of you who don’t feel women experience discrimination of any kind. You say it’s “all in their heads.”

For starters, I’m not mincing words here. Many of you are supporters of President Donald Trump. So he can do no wrong and anyone against him is the Devil. Period. The man could singlehandedly light a match, toss it and burn down a day care center with the children STILL IN IT and it would likely be met with the response, “FAKE NEWS!” or “ALTERNATIVE FACTS!” or “HILLARY/OBAMA BOUGHT THE MATCHES TO GIVE HIM!” or “THAT’S HOW WEAK THIS GENERATION IS. CAN’T EVEN SURVIVE A FIRE!” So…I’m not about to play stupid. This isn’t about that anyway.

What it IS about is this silly notion that keeping quiet makes you “stronger” or “tougher” in some kind of way. I’ve even heard some say that you are going to teach your daughters to “be strong” and ultimately “not say anything” or speak up if something happened to them, because after all, that’s what you were taught.

Number one, with all due respect, I feel bad for your daughters.

Number two, to me, keeping quiet does not symbolize strength or toughness. It symbolizes ACCEPTANCE. Acceptance of how you have been treated and will sadly continue to be treated.

Again, I’m not writing this to expect miracles. If you are for Trump, you’re against the women marching, no matter what they’re doing it for. That’s fine. I’m not in the mood to “argue” politics anyway. Already enough of that going around.

But I feel bad that you are teaching your daughters to be quiet. I feel bad that YOU were taught to be quiet. To not say anything. To not stand up for what they/you believe in. To let politics take the front seat to addressing issues of sexism and discrimination. To believe that this is completely made up. To believe that just because YOU may not have experienced this or that to feel a need to march, that NO ONE ELSE should do it, either.

For one thing, questioning the existence of the Women’s March because YOU “don’t need it” is like questioning the existence of hospitals because YOU aren’t sick.

Here’s the thing: IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU.

A LOT of women have participated in the march who haven’t been discriminated against. Haven’t dealt with sexism. I personally know of women who have gone through about a hundred times MORE than many of you claiming to be so strong and not needing to march.  See…they realize that it’s not all about them. The issue is MUCH bigger than one or two people.

Hell, as a man, of course I haven’t experienced much of the bad things women have. Does that make it appropriate for me to insinuate that they should “sit down and shut up” also, all because it may make ME uncomfortable?

Wrong. It’s not all about me.

Or you.

And while we’re on the topic of thinking you’re “strong” because you’re being quiet, well…you haven’t kept quiet with all your complaints about former President Obama over the last eight years or Hillary Clinton over the past year or so, correct? So the whole “keeping quiet” thing isn’t even something you LIVE by, but just a way to berate the women who are brave enough to stand up for something, all because you support Mr. Trump and they don’t.

Gotcha. Again…you expect ME to play stupid?

You got the wrong one.

There are also those of you who love to resort to the tired notion that those participating are lazy and jobless.

*insert eye roll*

For one thing, it was Saturday.

Two, there IS such a thing as vacation time or women participating AFTER working.

Three, I know of military women (being in the military myself for the last 19+ years) who have participated in the marches. And I KNOW they do more than you. So let’s not even go there.

The way many of you handle it is also to pick the worst of the worst and let THOSE be your justifications to say the march was a bad idea.

As with anything else, there are bad apples. Some women were way more extreme about things than they needed to be, even though there were NO arrests (for those who like to call them “thugs” and “criminals” all the usual nonsense). Those rioting were NOT part of the marches. They were just being stupid. But that does not represent the group as a whole. It’s weak to hide behind them to justify your displeasure. Unless you can prove it was the case, EVERYWHERE, save it.

If I treated every woman based on all the bad relationships I’ve been in, would you accept that?

Didn’t think so.

Now…GROWN adults would agree to disagree and move on. If the march isn’t for you, you wouldn’t have a need to berate those who do feel a need to participate, as you try to make yourself out to be SO much “stronger” and “tougher” than those women are.

Please. Some of you saying that complain about having to go to work every day. You fuss damn near every time your husband or kids do something. All hell breaks lose if you get stuck in traffic or lose your phones (as we ALL have to deal with). So again…you’re not fooling anybody.

I have much more respect for the women who decided to stand up and participate. These ladies have said that they’re not taking it anymore. Whether I support the cause or not (I GREATLY support this one), again…say it with me, girls…

…IT’S…NOT…ABOUT…ME…OR…YOU…

I say it like that because so many of you out there think people do stuff for your approval or need your permission.

I didn’t see any women ASK if they could do it. So as for your permission, yeah…

…they didn’t need it.

There is NOTHING “tough” or “strong” about being silenced. And there is NOTHING “weak” about SPEAKING or STANDING UP. Many of you fail to realize that some women participated, not for themselves, but to inspire those who too, have fallen into the trap of believing that they don’t have a right to speak up or that they are “weak” if they complain about anything.

A lot of you will simply have an issue anytime ANYONE speaks up about ANYTHING. Doesn’t matter how legal or peaceful it is. In YOUR eyes, people should just suck it up. “Suck it up, buttercup!” like some of you like to say, right?

Overused phrases, nor some pouting or constant threats to delete, block and unfollow everybody on social media won’t change anything. These women are NOT going away. They shouldn’t have to.

People standing up for themselves WILL continue to do so, whether you like it or not. Calling them names won’t change anything.

If you think it does…congratulations.

You’ve contributed to the VERY REASON they are marching in the first place.

 

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4 Responses to #WomensMarch: To Women Saying, “I Don’t Need To March!”…IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU

  1. rugby843 says:

    Loved this post.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m not participating in the march for various reasons (loving Trump NOT being one of them, ha ha!) But I fully agree they have the right to march. They have the right to protest. We have protections in place in this country to allow for that, and whether I agree or disagree with *any* groups’ message, I have no right to tell them that they shouldn’t be doing it (unless they are destroying property or hurting people, but that’s no longer a protest at that point, that’s criminal behavior no matter who is doing it. I do think the same freedom of speech extends to people who don’t support it – they have the right to say “I do not support it for X reason” or whatever (free speech goes both ways) but both sides should be respectful to one another. Sadly I have seen outright ridiculous antics from *both* sides. When a group which I was a member of sent out invites to march, and I declined, the woman in charge sent several pressuring messages, and when I finally quit the group because I don’t respect pressure tactics from *anyone*, I got a nasty reply saying “Will you quit being a woman, too?” I know that that individual is not a representative of all the women participating, but neither are the ones running their mouths on the right indicative of all the women not marching, and everyone needs to calm down and realize that – on both sides. (I know YOU do, but there are so many on BOTH sides who don’t.) It just makes me sad that each side yells free speech without realizing that free speech extends to everyone, whether we agree with what they are saying or not 😦

    Liked by 1 person

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