#BillCosby and #MeToo: Black Folks, Stop Using Unarmed Black Men To Minimize Sexual Assault

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You know how much you hate hearing that, right? This usually comes after a white person kills someone black; most often, when white police officers are involved.

This isn’t about black-on-black crime, though. We already know that most of the time, this is only used as a dismissing tool. Those who throw this out there only say it in hopes to shut black people up. After all, since we kill each other, it’s okay for it to be “open season” for them, right?

By now, you’ve likely hear that Bill Cosby, 80, has been found guilty on all three counts of aggravated indecent assault against one woman, Andrea Constand, 45, from an incident on January of 2004. Six women testified in the case, while dozens of women to date have come forward with allegations.

Cosby has himself recently admitted to giving Quaaludes to women that he wanted to have sex with back in 2005.

I can do an entire blog post on this alone. But my issue here is how I’ve seen in so many areas on social media, black people asking how Bill Cosby can be found guilty of this, yet nothing is being done about all the unarmed black men who are shot and killed as often as they are.

The treatment of black men and blacks in general by far too many folks who are not of color in our society is horrible. Period. I don’t argue that for a second. This doesn’t include all white people (not that that should need to be said every time, especially since many don’t go through the trouble of saying that about us black people).

However, this is NOT the time to bring that up.

This is about SEXUAL ASSAULT.

There is no good reason to use the killings of unarmed black men as an argument to what happened with Cosby. Why did this happen as opposed to killers of unarmed black men being found guilty?

That’s what it sounds like.

They are two entirely different instances and should be treated as such.

The biggest problem with the “What about…?” defense is simply this, and what I believe most people aren’t seeing. The same groups are NOT involved in both cases. The reason Cosby was found guilty has absolutely NOTHING to do with why white cops are let off the hook when unarmed black men are shot. Heck, as far as we know, those who would find Cosby guilty would still despise that unarmed black men are killed at the rate they are.

Didn’t consider that, did you?

But that’s the problem with putting them both together. This question isn’t valid because two entirely different groups of society are involved. This would work if you knew for a fact that the same people were involved in both cases.

Racism AND sexual assault are MAJOR PROBLEMS in our society. I don’t think anyone can argue that.

Well, some would. Those would be the ones who view the president is the Second Coming of Jesus Christ. Another day for that one.

I know that many of us can multitask. So how come there’s this feeling that we can only address ONE of these problems? Can I not be angry about sexual assault AND unarmed black men being killed? As a black men, let me tell you…that is exactly where I am.

Why should sexual assault be buried here? So, because unarmed black men have been shot and killed, that means that NO black sexual predators should ever be punished, otherwise we wonder why that happened, but there’s still no fast solution about the killings of unarmed black men?

Now, back to what I first spoke about. Black-on-black crime. You know how much you hate that, why? Because we feel it minimizes what happens when white people commit crimes against us. We get the feeling that white people don’t care when they bring that up. I’ve heard countless black people say some form of this.

So…how is it okay for us to do it now?

Would it not sound like WE don’t care about women being sexually assaulted?

Someone will look at this and find some way to say that they are not the same. But I have a hard time not seeing that:


and then,




and then,


Again…I can’t see how those are different.

I don’t blame society for going here sometimes. Comparing is in our DNA. It’s hard not to. When it seems as though people care more about one thing than another as many of us feel it should not be the case, that’s our comfort zone. “If you care about this thing, then why don’t you care about that thing?” especially when the two appear similar and we hear people speak of one and not the other. It’s an easy trap to get caught in.

But if we can catch it when someone does it against us, then we are able to identify it. So there’s shouldn’t be much reason we use one against the other.

Doing that is a slap in the face to every woman who experiences sexual assault in some form, which sadly is FAR TOO MANY. Not to mention the women who have been involved with Cosby. The same way the “black-on-black crime” question is a slap in the face to us.


I’m not looking for opinions on whether or not you believe Cosby is guilty. My mind is on the women involved who were sexually assaulted and the women who have been and ARE sexually assaulted every day. I can sit aside my thoughts and feelings on unarmed black men being killed in favor of speaking about the issue of sexual assault in this country and how this culture has been normalized.

Speaking about sexual assault doesn’t diminish racism. I’m sure women aren’t going around and getting sexually assaulted just as a way to distract from what happens to us every day. So our reaction shouldn’t be as though it does.

If we want people to respect us and what we have to experience on just about a daily basis in this country, a good start would be to show that we have the ability to care what happens to others as well, especially something as serious as sexual assault.

If not, all we’re doing is contributing to the problem and doing the same “Yeah, but…” that we hate for white people to do to us.

This entry was posted in Bill Cosby, Black community, Black Lives Matter, Blacks, MeToo, sex crimes, Sexual Assault, sexual harassment, unarmed black men and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to #BillCosby and #MeToo: Black Folks, Stop Using Unarmed Black Men To Minimize Sexual Assault

  1. Nellie Coker says:

    Great blog, so true


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