I am taking a short break at the moment. My mind is very busy and wound up right now, so I figured the best thing to do is to try and relax it for a few minutes, along with getting out some of what I’m feeling right now.
What am I taking a break from? Writing. I am an aspiring screenwriter. Simply put, I am working on movie scripts to send to agencies/production companies and if they approve, they will make my screenplay(s) into a movie or movies.
People often say that most of the fun lies within the journey itself. That’s definitely true here. To create what could become a movie sometime in the future is a LOT of fun. Creating characters, stories and watching the stories unfold is amazing, especially since I’m the one making up the story.
Writing a screenplay is hard work. I’ve been a writer for many years, so I can imagine it is not as difficult for me as it would be for others. A little research goes a long way, and that’s what I’ve been doing since I started this a few months ago. The best thing about this is that I don’t personally know a SINGLE person who is an aspiring screenwriter. I’ve met a few people online, but that’s it. This basically forces me to learn and do it all, or at least most of it, myself. The “learning how to fish” method, rather than having someone “give me a fish.”
A movie can reach anywhere in the world. Something I’m creating, sitting in my small den, could possibly reach any or all of the several billion people who occupy this planet. I cannot wrap my mind around that. To say my mind is blown at the thought of that doesn’t even begin to cover it.
As for the journey, well…it’s good that I’m a loaner. That allows me PLENTY of time to think about my work and to actually DO the work. Considering that it takes some people YEARS to break through as a screenwriter, I realize that I need to work as hard and as much as I can NOW. That means I need to spend all my free time working on this as much as possible. I need to do the work, send it in, get some feedback, take my lumps, go back to the drawing board and keep it moving. Being a loaner is also great because I don’t resent staying in on Friday and Saturday nights to do this. I don’t have a need to be around people all the time, especially since my wife is in Korea until November. I don’t need to go out and drink half the weekend away. We do have two children and I do take them out and we enjoy ourselves, but if the kids are asleep or at school/day care, I’m working.
I think it’s safe to say that I have become obsessed with this. Not in an unhealthy way, because I don’t neglect the children or my other responsibilities. I mean that I’m CONSTANTLY thinking about my work and what’s going to come next. It’s too easy to become distracted and I don’t want to fall in that trap of a simple distraction derailing me for three weeks. I also say I’ve become obsessed with this because when I talk to my wife on FaceTime, she can tell that I’ve been working hard at it because of how tired I am. Anyone who has written anything knows how mentally draining that can be. My mind is just so wound up and relaxing is just impossible sometimes. Sleep doesn’t happen much, either. I wake up once in the middle of the night and my mind is ready to get to work.
This will be a TREMENDOUS accomplishment if I can make this happen. I absolutely LOVE to write. This is my passion. I am driven EVERY DAY to make this happen and I have all the confidence in the world that someday, it will.
Another interesting aspect of taking a journey like this is the support I’m receiving from my family and friends, or lack thereof. For the most part, I’m largely disregarded whenever I mention this to anyone. Yes, I get a few “likes” here and there on Facebook, but most of the time, people don’t really say anything. I’m fine with that. That could either mean that many don’t believe this is something I can accomplish or they don’t care. I’m fine with that, too. I’m not exactly sure who’s truly in my corner and who isn’t. I say “truly” because it’s easy for someone to SAY they support me and wish me the best, but to MEAN it is something different entirely and quite frankly, I don’t have the time or patience to try and figure out who these people are. I can count on one hand the people I know who have always been there and there are no questions in my mind that they wish me the best. Others, not so much.
The great thing is that my passion and drive is not determined by anything like that and it never has been. Whether people have faith that I can do this is irrelevant, because I’m doing it. Period.
That’s it for now. Back to work for me.